Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Ants!

I woke up at 7:15. I brought in the rainwater collected last night. I put on an audio and listened while I filtered the water and put the jars down in the basement where it is cooler and darker. I started my routine. I got an e-mail from Tamme who wanted to see our family Saturday afternoon, so I called Faye, but she did not answer. Then I called William and that conversation went on for awhile as he explained to me how to drive stick shift. I went back to reading e-mail while another audio played. A lady from Jehovah's Witness came by. After she left, I wondered if she had been here Monday and dropped the decongestant. I called Dad to ask him about Saturday afternoon and all next week. I finished my routine and an audio that was difficult to listen to because of the speaker's accent. I noticed that all of a sudden the kitchen floor was full of tiny ants. I put down some Terro, wondering how they showed up so quickly. They found the royal jelly, which is a bee product. I washed the outside of the container really well. I checked e-mail then juiced celery, carrots, pea pods and broccoli stems. By the time I cleaned up and drank it, noon had come and gone. I hadn't heard from Chris so I called him. Then I remembered that being in Honolulu, he was five hours behind me. When we hung up, it was so each of us could get breakfast. After I ate breakfast, I tapped with another video. Then I heated up a frypan to cook some organic ground beef. I could not believe it was raining again. I told it to go west as I put the water bins back out to collect. I brought in the mail. There were four condolence cards. I did a lot of tapping. I always knew I would feel great grief at her passing, but there are so many other emotions I did not expect, and I have to process them all before her funeral so I can be functional. I checked the front porch and found the rest of my Amazon order. I brought one of the small boxes to the counter to open. When I felt a flood of ants crawling up my ankle, I realized that I had stepped on the Terro card. I brushed them off and put out another one in case one was not enough to 'feed' all those ants. Chris called me from the airport, three hours before his flight was due to take off. I laid down while I talked to him. I was tired from the tapping and crying. Eventually I made myself get up. I watered the vegetables with minerals. I processed the newly collected rainwater. I looked up poems and readings for funerals. I selected several and printed them out. I also e-mailed them to Faye to see what she thought of them. I mowed the side yard by the ditch, realizing that I can't possibly mow enough to prevent it from growing tall while we are gone. I watched more grief tapping videos on Youtube. I swept up the ants, which still seemed to be multiplying. I emptied the dustpan into a grocery bag and set it outside. I took a shower. Chris will be home tomorrow and I don't want him to see how bad things are. I tapped for the difficulty of packing. I started packing by cleaning out the suitcase, and assembling my toiletries. For some reason, that is when it hit me that I completely forgot about my doctor's appt today. Aargh! Ok, so it is time to post to my blog even though I think I will stay up to pack some more.
 *  Here is another photo of my mom  *

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